My name is Jayne. I am a wife, daughter, sister, cousin, niece, aunt, friend, new blogger, amateur jewelry designer, lover of old black and white movies, transcendental meditation practitioner, avid reader, closet anglophile, political spectator, dog owner, homeowner, sometime gardener, music lover, foodie, onetime cookbook editor, would be fashionista and home decorator. And I live with chronic pain, which is often unbearable.
In 2001, I had a typical banana peel type fall and damaged my coccyx, cervical and lumbar spine. Although I had multiple spinal surgeries, countless therapies and endless treatments, I simply never healed. Anxiety, panic attacks and agoraphobia, childhood and young adult issues I had thought long ago put to bed, resurfaced along with severe depression. I developed occipital neuralgia, small fiber neuropathy and in 2016 was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. This is all in addition to the continued chronic cervical, lumbar and coccyx pain from the initial injury. In an instant, my entire life changed and there is not one corner of it that has not been affected by my injury and the subsequent search for recovery: physical, emotional, mental, sexual, environmental, social, financial, familial.
You will not find me on social media. I don’t facebook or tweet or instagram. I have a small group of friends and the most amazing, supportive and loving husband imaginable. I live in a 126 year old home in a hip neighborhood in the western United States. I have a canine buddy named Bentley, a Silky Terrier who spends most of his time by my side and who promptly alerts me when there is another canine walking past our domicile. I have no children and I was forced into early retirement.
So why have I decided to blog when I have been so private for so long? Because I am massively fatigued by the isolation this chronic condition has foisted upon me and I wish to find my voice again. At this point in my life, I am in all likelihood not going to achieve the dreams I had in my youth. But perhaps, by releasing some of which has been so pent up inside of me, and by sharing my story and my journey, I can make a tiny bit of a difference.